Get Clear & Decisive
Jan 12, 2019When you’re faced with an opportunity do you know instantly if it’s right for you or do you need to ponder and consider?
When you need to make a quick decision about your next step, do you waste your time and energy wondering what to do next or do you act quickly with speed and conviction?
Are you focused on the next key step to take, or do you get lost in confusion and overwhelm?
If you’re struggling with any of these behaviours now or in the past, then read on for the solution.
I’m going to share a simple and easy process for you to work through on your own to get clear and decisive.
Here’s some theory to describe how you process information:
Throughout the years that I’ve coached clients, I noticed that some people were quite certain about their goals and the direction that they were going in their business. These people were motivated by moving towards their goals.
While others were more focused on what they didn’t want or didn’t have in their business. These people usually didn’t have a have a big picture goal and were stuck in overwhelm. These people were motivated by moving away from what they didn’t want in their business. They had a vague idea of what they wanted.
From my NLP (neuro-linguistic programming) training, I discovered the reason for how you’re programmed that explains this further.
You are consistently and constantly processing all the millions of pieces of data that are coming at you every second. The data is either deleted or distorted or generalized based on the filters that are running unconsciously in your brain.
One of those filters is called “Meta Programs”. The concept of Meta Programs was originally conceived by Dr. Carl Jung. Dr. Jung was a Swiss psychiatrist and psychoanalyst who founded analytical psychology.
Through the NLP Master Practitioner training, I learned that there are 21 Meta Programs that you are running unconsciously all the time.
One of these Meta Programs is the Direction Filter and it defines what is important to you and how you’re motivated.
As a coach, this is one of the key factors that I need to understand when I’m coaching a client. If you’re a leader or a parent or a teacher, then you’ll also find discovering how your employee or child or student is motivated.
People will have a predominant direction preference. At either end of a continuum, they will lean either “Towards” or “Away From” or some combination in between.
Here’s how you can discover what your direction filter is:
Ask yourself:
What do you want in your business?
What’s important about what you do?
What was your response?
If you have a clear focus on the future and what you want to create, then you’re likely motivated by going towards your goals.
However you’re motivated is just fine.
You are perfect just the way you are.
Having awareness of your motivation and your direction filter will help you make decisions easier.
If your direction filter is more of a “Towards” focus, you’ll find making decisions a bit easier, generally speaking.
If your direction filter is more on the “Away From” focus, here’s an exercise to guide you to turn towards what you do want.
Clarity Through Contrast:
This is a technique that I learned when I went through my year-long Coaching Training at Transformational Arts College in Toronto. I’ve been using this technique successfully with my clients for years.
It is easier to get clear and make decisions when you are constantly seeking what you want.
If, like me, your direction filter is more of an away from tendency and you’re motivated by moving away from what you don’t want.
Follow these simple steps to get Clarity:
Pull out a black piece of paper or open a blank document.
On the left side of the page, list all the things that are troubling you about the situation. What is stopping you? What negative thoughts to you have? These are called Contrasts.
Now, review each item on the left side of the page and for each item, ask yourself “What do I want that is the opposite of this?”
Write what you want in a positive manner on the right side under Clarity.
Cross off all the items on the left side of the page under contrasts.
Create a brand-new list of items that you do want and will focus going forward.
Now that you know exactly what you’re moving towards, you’ll find that it’s easy to answer when opportunity knocks or you have a decision to make in your business.
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